Love has proven to be an elusive concept to grasp. What we think is love, is often proven to be lust, and heartbreak seems to be inescapable. The present landscape offers much to be desire. Social media offers a lot, but very few answers about love.

I have compiled a list of 10 pieces of media that taught me about love. Each item on this list taught me something that freed me from my former ideas on love or gave me an insight I had yet to consider. Give any of these titles a try if you’re feeling deflated, uninspired, and unloved.

1. All About Love by bell hooks

All About Love is a well-researched and well-articulated piece about the revolutionary act of love. Hooks is considered a premiere feminist writer, but many will enjoy this title. It is not filled with passages about how patriarchy has failed us, but instead how we’ve learned love from a place of pain and need assistance and perspective in relearning. Hooks presents many ideas, supported by other scholars of love, that open the idea of loving from being a sacred space of intimacy, into a way of life to live and share in.

2. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

The Alchemist novel has seen international success. Selling more than 100 million copies and being translated into over 80 languages, it is not enough to say the message in The Alchemist is universal. A story about a young shepherd boy in search of his purpose, The Alchemist shows us that searching does not mean you are lost, as well as the power of letting go. The shepherd is met with many opportunities to be happy and content, but at the price of his curiosity. He even finds love in a woman, who encourages him to continue the pursuit of his purpose. In this piece I learned that love should be freeing and supportive of our hopes and dreams.

3. The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying by Sogyal Rinpoche

Rinpoche was a Tibetan Dzogchen lama of the Nyingma tradition. He wrote about the meaning of existence and produced this spiritual classic in 1992. This title takes us deep into the meaning of life, in a Buddhist framework. It shows us that the western view of death, leaves us fearful, and fear feeds our unpleasant behaviors. We are not good to ourselves or others due to our fear of death. This title taught me to find the fullness in life and those I share my life with.

4. The Joy of Living Dangerously by Osho

Osho, also known as Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh, made infamous by the Netflix documentary series Wild Wild Country. The title listed here is one of many, but this is one of my favorites. He speaks of fear and living life in fullness. He also talks of love in a non-possessive way. Osho taught me that love is admiration of a soul, as they are, and not just in relation to how they make us feel. Osho encourages readers to see ourselves in the present and love without fear, therefore freeing ourselves and allowing more substantial bonds to grow with others.

5. Goodnight Moon by Margaret Wise Brown

This is probably surprising to those who have made it this far in the list. It is a familiar title that many of us loved as kids, but what in the hell does it have to do with love? My answer? Everything! Goodnight Moon is a story about child like idealism of the world around us. Saying “goodnight” to everyone from the mice to the moon is about deep appreciation of all parts of our life, and just the simple acknowledgement of care. A nightly routine is deeply comforting to children and so is this story to me.

6. Teaching My Mother to Give Birth by Warsan Shire

Warsan Shire is a powerful poet who teaches us the beauty and the pain of women in her debut title. It is an intersection between love, religion, and womanhood. Teaching us that complexity lies in the lessons we pass from generation to generation. Writing from the perspective of a modern woman from a more traditional world, Warsan teaches us that love may not have all the answers, but it does give us experiences, that we grow and learn from. Love is the map we need to find ourselves.

7. Corduroy by Don Freeman

Another childhood classic with a beautiful message. Corduroy is a book about a stuffed teddy bear who lives in a department store and who needs a home. When this bear meets a young girl who seems interested in loving him, he is devastated when he left behind. After hunting for a new button to make himself complete, Corduroy is taken home with his missing button and given a new one by the young girl. This title teaches us that we are enough even in our imperfections.

8. Black Boy Gold by Jasmine Mans

An audio poetry album by a Chicago poet, it is an underrated classic. Mans produced an ode to the late Tupac Shakur and all the Black boys attempting to find her way. She criticizes the music industry and lessons but also speaks of love in a way that is raw, gritty, and uncomfortable. Black Boy Gold challenges us to step outside of ourselves and into a perspective of hardship. Encouraging us to love even when it feels most challenging.

9. Baracoon by Zora Neale Hurston

Zora Neale Hurston is a goddess amongst men. She dedicated her life to preserving and documenting the history and culture of Black American, southern culture and folklore. Baracoon is a late release, given to us in 2019. It is a title filled with layers of intricacy on what it means to be Black in America. Zora interviews one of the last living survivors of the slave trade, a man named Kudjoe, who finds it difficult to share his story on many days, but Zora persist. It is a story of patience, love, and perspective. An opportunity for Black Americans and African Americans to find a bridge that leads to collective understanding. The persistence of Zora’s desire to preserve this history is a statement of love worthy of its own praise.

10. Breakfast At Tiffany’s starring Aubrey Hepburn

This classic film is sure to tug at any romantic’s heartstrings. It is a fun and lighthearted story about love finding us when we least expect it. Hepburn plays Holly Golightly, a drifter with a shrouded but troubled past. She is seeking a wealthy mate to make her life easier. She meets a man who has selected the same mission for his own life. After a slow entry into love Holly must decide if what she always wanted is right under her nose? This film taught me that love is often where we least expect it, which means we may very well be blind to it. We may not always fulfill our fantasies but it’s possible that’s a good thing.

Programs used: Word

Date: 9/20/21

Wollaston, S. (2018, April 24). Growing up in the Wild Wild Country Cult: 'You Heard people having sex all the time, like baboons'. The Guardian. Retrieved September 20, 2021, from https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2018/apr/24/wild-wild-country-netflix-cult-sex-noa-maxwell-bhagwan-shree-rajneesh-commune-childhood.

About sogyal rinpoche. Sogyal Rinpoche. (n.d.). Retrieved September 20, 2021, from https://sogyalrinpoche.org/about-sogyal-rinpoche.